I hesitate to share my votes. Doing so seems to put relationships at risk. And you, my readers, are a relationship I’d rather not risk. Alas, if I don’t stand for something, I’ll fall for anything.
Don’t shame me for my choices. I like what I like. You might like something else. That’s fine. We can still get along.
So, without further ado, my 2020 Halloween Candy Power Rankings:
Note: movie theater candies were not eligible for consideration. Otherwise, this post would’ve consisted of two words: Sno Caps. Toughest omissions: 100 Grand and Butterfinger
I feel like my rankings don’t need explanation. Good taste is obvious. But I suppose every voter feels that way. So, I’ll explain my choices. Unlike real life, I’m here to advocate for my preferences, not to yell at you about why not to vote for others. In reverse order:
- 5. Kit Kat. Is there anything better? Well, yes, the next four on this list. Still, I feel like Kit Kat is sneaky underrated. Especially given the fact that it played such a crucial role in an episode of The Office. The crunch of those layers? Perfection! Oh, and if you eat them without breaking off a piece of that Kit Kat bar? You should be disbarred from whatever job you have. Tip: freeze before eating.
- 4. Junior Mints. A stunningly refreshing combination of mint and chocolate. If you think these are only a movie candy, I’ll fight you. The tiny Halloween box is a perfect first date: it satisfies you, but leaves you wanting more. Oh, and having pointed out Kit Kat’s relevance to The Office, I’d be remiss not to remind you of Junior Mints’ appearance in Seinfeld.
- 3. Krackel. I feel like this will be controversial. I love Krackel. It’s a better version of Kit Kat. Probably could be #1, but is it available in a regular size throughout the year? In the fall, my mom buys those grab bags that include a variety of tiny Hershey’s, Mr. Good Bar, something else, and Krackel. When she puts them out, I treat the Krackels like they’re the chocolate munchkins in a box of 25 mixed. Literally, the best candy that I’ve never had but in its miniature Halloween version.
- 2. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. In Hannaford’s the other day, I saw a 6 pack! For those of you who grew up more recently than I, back in the days of less excess than now, only 2 peanut butter cups came per package. Oh, the humanity!! Peanut Butter Cups are the second-best food combination ever created.* You will be summarily disbarred if I learn that you aren’t freezing your peanut butter cups.
- 1. *Peanut M&M’s. Have you ever been asked “if you could only have one food the rest of your life, what would it be?” I have. Recently. Such are the questions that arise in the Garage Bar. Last weekend, I answered “Peanut M&Ms.” In Anna Karenina, published in 1878, Tolstoy wrote, “If you look for perfection, you’ll never be content.” Leo, stop looking! It’s not your fault that Peanut M&M’s weren’t mass marketed until 1954! Collectively, have we garnered more contentment from, or witnessed anything more perfect than, Mars’ polyamorous marriage of a nut, a thin layer of chocolate, and a brightly colored and refreshingly crisp candy shell?
Onto the quiz!
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- Exception: Question 5. We try to play that one honest.
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It is not uncommon for me to receive an inquiry in which a lawyer asks about the information that can be included in a particular type of motion. For example: “Mike, I’m thinking of filing a motion __ _______________, but I don’t want to disclose any confidences.”
Typically, I reply with something like: “I think it’s best to cite to whichever paragraph of the rule applies. Then, if asked for more by the court, answer, but only by providing the information necessary to respond to the court’s specific question. The motion doesn’t give you license to start blabbing about the client.”
What type of motion is most often the subject of the inquiry outlined above?
- A. To disqualify opposing counsel.
- B. To have the client’s competency evaluated.
- C. To withdraw.
- D. To recuse the judge.
The trust account rules require lawyers to reconcile trust accounts:
- A. Timely, with “timely” being no less than monthly
- B. Every other month
- C. As often as required by generally accepted accounting principles.
- D. The rules are silent. But the Vermont Supreme Court has held that trust accounts must be reconciled no less than quarterly.
Lawyer represented Client. Once the representation ended, Client gave Lawyer a gift. Which is most accurate?
- A. Lawyer must not accept the gift
- B. Lawyer may accept the gift, but only if Lawyer handled the matter pro bono
- C. Lawyer may accept the gift, especially if it’s a simple gift such as a holiday present or token of the client’s appreciation.
- D. Mike, objection. The premise of this question is pure fantasy.
Which is in a different rule than the others?
- A. Same or substantially related matter.
- B. Materially adverse interests.
- C. Informed consent, confirmed in writing.
- D. Remonstrate with the client and, if necessary, take reasonable remedial measures.
At seminars and in blog posts, I often talk about the duty of competence insofar as it relates to the preservation and production of a client’s electronically stored information.
Earlier this week, a New York judge issued a ruling in Parlux v. Carter. The judge concluded that the defendant, Shaun Carter, had improperly destroyed emails relevant to the case and, therefore, that if the case goes to trial, the jury will be instructed that it can draw an adverse inference from the fact that the emails are missing.
While sued under his legal name, Carter, a world-famous musician and mogul, is better known by his stage name. I’ve previously mentioned him in this blog, noting that one of his most iconic songs has been described as “a hornbook on the 4th Amendment.” To wit, the second verse’s lessons on traffic stops, vehicle searches, racial profiling, and probable cause.
Indeed, in the civil case, the missing emails have quickly risen to the top of the list of Carter’s problems.
Who is Carter better known as?