Tuesday Morning Answers – Holiday Quiz

You know this blog has established itself when, on Christmas Day, my mom somewhat ruefully notes that she wishes she hadn’t given me a Runner’s World calendar, but a Taylor Swift one instead.

Friday’s quiz is here.  The answers follow today’s Honor Roll.

Swift Christmas

Honor Roll

Answers

Question 1

Attorney represents Egg and Nog.   They’ve been charged with criminal conspiracy to face unafraid the plans that they’d made.

Undeterred by Comment 23 to Rule 1.7 (conflicts), but motivated by a desire to comply with Rules 1.1 (competence) and 1.3 (diligence), Attorney tracks down a key witness: Parson Brown.  Parson Brown agrees to an interview, but only if it’s outside.

What’s Parson Brown made of?

Snow.  Parson Brown is a character in Walking in a Winter Wonderland.

Question 2

My posts on legal ethics & marijuana are here.

Having secured an acquittal for Egg & Nog by successfully employing the “but it was just a dream by the fire!” defense, Attorney is back at it: representing new co-defendants.   Tommy and Marin have been charged with possession of extraordinarily large quantities.

Upon concluding an initial interview with Tommy and Marin, Attorney called me with an inquiry about Attorney’s duties under Rule 1.14 (client with diminished capacity.) Here’s our exchange:

  • Attorney – Mike, i don’t want my license to go up in smoke.  I’ve got co-defendants, Tommy & Marin.  Tommy thinks that Santa is a band! When I told him Santa isn’t a band, he thought maybe Santa was a Motown singer.  When I asked him how he didn’t know who Santa is, he replied ‘yeah, well, I’m not from here, man. Like, I’m from Pittsburgh, man. I don’t know too many local dudes.’
  • Me – Interesting.
  • Attorney:  And Marin isn’t much better.  He kinda knows who Santa is.
  • Me – Kinda?
  • Attorney.  Yeah.  He thinks that Santa and Mrs. Claus used to live in his neighborhood before getting evicted and  moving up north to start a commune with some of their friends.  Marin told me that Mrs. Claus used to make the best brownies in the neighborhood. He also thinks that Santa shut down the commune so as not to risk getting stopped at the border and found with the ‘magic dust’ that he feeds to his reindeer.

Who are Attorney’s clients better known as?

Cheech & Chong.  See, Santa Claus and his Old Lady

Question 3

Lawyer represents Client.  Client is charged with kidnapping Clarice and assaulting a gallant suitor who attempted to free her.  Client is also charged with the felony murder of one Yukon Cornelius.  Yukon is presumed dead.  He disappeared off a cliff during the daring rescue mission of Clarice and her suitor that Yukon carried out with an heretofore incompetent dentist.

But lo’ and behold, the prosecutor learns that Yukon is alive and well!  As required by Rule 3.8(d), prosecutor notifies Lawyer and, then, as required by Rule 3.1, dismisses the felony murder charge.

Lawyer works diligently to convince prosecutor to drop the remaining charges.  After all, despite a monstrous reputation, Client is winning in the court of public opinion.  If only because Client’s physical stature comes in handy during the holidays.

Who is Lawyer’s client?

Bumbles bounce! Bumble the Abominable Snow Monster

Bumble

Question 4

Attorney represents Michael Scott’s co-workers.  They have filed a civil suit against him & Dunder Mifflin.  The suit makes various tort claims related to the undisputed fact that, in the middle of the The Office’s holiday party, Michael unilaterally changed its format.

Attorney is mindful of the duties imposed by Rule 1.8(g). (aggregate settlement in a matter involving 2 or more clients.)

In any event, the party format was advertised as, and actually began as, “Secret Santa.” Upset with how things were going, Michael switched it to a different format.

Name the format.

Yankee Swap

Gifts

Question 5

Lawyer called me with an inquiry.  Lawyer’s questions related to Rule 1.18 (prospective clients) and Rule 3.1 (meritorious claims).  Per Lawyer:

  • Lawyer:  Mike, last week, I met with Cady Heron.  She wants to sue to expand the holiday season so that it officially begins on October 3.
  • Mike:  Wait.  What?
  • Lawyer:  Umm, exactly.  She said that’s the day that her crush, Aaron, first talked to her.
  • Mike:  Wow. I don’t know what to say.
  • Lawyer:  Well, maybe I’ll just ignore her.  I mean, she’s not very nice.  Plus, I refused to take a retainer.
  • Mike:  Because her claim is frivolous?
  • Lawyer: No.  Because she wanted to pay by credit card and I told her that I don’t take The Plastic.

Sadly, this scene didn’t make it past the cutting room floor.  Had it, I wouldn’t be here today.

Name the movie.

Mean Girls

October 3rd.jpg